I'm NOT Crazy!!
I fucking hate doctors. Have I ever mentioned that on here before? Yeah. Hate them. And hate is a word I don't often use. Now, because they can't figure out what's wrong with me...I must be crazy, making it up, or someother syndrome that means they have no fucking clue what's wrong with me: therefore, it must be my own fault. My broken rib is hurting more and more each day instead of less, and the dizziness only seems to happen when the rib pain is present...the blackouts as well only seem to happen after the rib pain begins and shortness of breath takes over. So because they're dumb and can't figure out a cause, I must be crazy. As if it's an either or situation.
And I keep trying to tell them that I'm in A LOT of pain in my ribs, but they don't believe me because it's been so long since they got broken. Their mentality is that it should be almost healed by now so I shouldn't be in pain (yeah, I'm imagining that too). Trust me, I don't admit to feeling pain often and usually if I say, "I'm in a lot of pain" it means rush me to the ER. Even if I'm not crying or whining about it. Most people who know me well, know this. I hate pills, I never take them except in extreme situations. So the fact that I'm even taking anything at all means I'm hurting really badly, and the fact that I wish I could be taking more than what I am, means a lot! And all these fucking fakers around here who ARE just trying to get out of the Army, and keep coming up with more symptoms that can't be proven, make me look bad. Unlike them, I do NOT want out of the Army; crazy as it sounds, I like the Army. It was everything I thought it was going to be (good and bad).
And today, after I got back from a long day at a local miltary hospital, I tried to just eat my lunch and get ready for class, but I felt like I was gonna pass out, so I went to my platoon leader. They made me lie down in the company area for a few hours to "monitor me" and then let me come back to my room. But while I was down there, my commander made me start a log of all the days I've had symptoms and what they were.....so they can start a med board packet on me!!!! Which in case you don't know, will get me kicked out of the Army if it goes through.
And I keep trying to tell them that I'm in A LOT of pain in my ribs, but they don't believe me because it's been so long since they got broken. Their mentality is that it should be almost healed by now so I shouldn't be in pain (yeah, I'm imagining that too). Trust me, I don't admit to feeling pain often and usually if I say, "I'm in a lot of pain" it means rush me to the ER. Even if I'm not crying or whining about it. Most people who know me well, know this. I hate pills, I never take them except in extreme situations. So the fact that I'm even taking anything at all means I'm hurting really badly, and the fact that I wish I could be taking more than what I am, means a lot! And all these fucking fakers around here who ARE just trying to get out of the Army, and keep coming up with more symptoms that can't be proven, make me look bad. Unlike them, I do NOT want out of the Army; crazy as it sounds, I like the Army. It was everything I thought it was going to be (good and bad).
And today, after I got back from a long day at a local miltary hospital, I tried to just eat my lunch and get ready for class, but I felt like I was gonna pass out, so I went to my platoon leader. They made me lie down in the company area for a few hours to "monitor me" and then let me come back to my room. But while I was down there, my commander made me start a log of all the days I've had symptoms and what they were.....so they can start a med board packet on me!!!! Which in case you don't know, will get me kicked out of the Army if it goes through.
posted by AeroAangel at 15:41
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